To dust or not to dust. That is the question.

I would love to be able to tell you that I dust and clean the house every week but this is not the case. It is one of the few chores that I have yet to delegate because I have delegated chores that really do need to be at least weekly, like the bathrooms and kitchen floor.

And then there is the question of the sense in dusting every week. I like a clean house and at the same time I know that when I dust it will only be a matter of days before I can see more dust in its place. I once heard it described as being similar to training for a sporting event that never happens. This isn't quite true of course.
We all know how we like to have everything spick and span for visitors and even for ourselves. But cleaning the house is time consuming and I know that when I spend that time on other tasks that will have a more completed outcome I feel more fulfilled.

Is that the problem? Cleaning is frustrating because it is always going to be there. Feeding the family is a bit like that. Shop, put away, cook, feed and wash up every day however there are more rewards. Feeding the family is an act of love, nourishing ourselves and those we love. It is also a time for the family to sit and chat, to keep in touch, share news and views and generally continue to build a life-time of bonds and memories. Food has always been associated with celebrations and mile stones. The same could hardly be said of cleaning the house.

So is it the cleaning or the mind set that is the issue? Maybe a different mind set will encourage me to effectively delegate the dusting, even if means offering payment to one of the children, or to do it myself every week. It doesn't take very long and being able to see the dust layer grow does nothing for me.

What are you thoughts on cleaning? Weekly, more or less often? Who does the cleaning in your house? And does anyone have any tips on how to dust in a way that slows down the amount of dust that gathers each week?

Happy cleaning
love
Sarah

Help. What happens when the words dry up?

Help. What do you do when you have nothing to say, nothing to talk about and therefore nothing to write about? Of course I can chat quite comfortably with my family and friends because we discuss things we have in common or catch up on each others news. But writing a 20 minute blog as part of my course in writing somehow doesn't have the same rules about what I can write about.

There are no official rules about writing a blog, that I know of and please add a link to rules if you know of them in the comment box below. But whilst there are no official rules there are always the 'known' rules in the same way that we know there are certain topics that you  should not discuss in polite company or in various situations. I was always taught that it was inappropriate to discuss religion or politics at dinner parties and other gatherings such as the big conference dinners we used to attend with my parents. At home you don't bring up personal family issues with guests and of course you never discuss your (or anyone else's) sex life in any company. I am guessing that these rules may have changed for younger generations.

In addition to not having anything to write about I have also been very tired following a business trip late last week and added this to my list of excuses to not write my blog for a few days. If in doubt do overwhelm. Overwhelm is the brain's way of protecting us from having to take action. Think back to a time when you last did overwhelm and remember what you had to do to take action. What caused me to finally stop doing overwhelm and sit down and write this blog? My mentor and teacher for the writing course. She told me that I had to write for 20 minutes a day even if it was just random words until sentences started to form.

I have heard of writers block and I guess that this is one form of it. Having nothing to say is not the same as having nothing appropriate to say but it still leaves me procrastinating when it comes to writing this blog.

If anyone would like to enter some suggestions for topics about which I could write for 20 minutes for this blog please enter them into the comment box below. I thank you in advance.

In the meanwhile I have managed to complete my 20 minutes and share my total lack of topic and hope that in some way it has served at least one person out there by demonstrating that even when faced with overwhelm the best way to deal with it is to take positive action towards working through the issues and tasks at hand.

until tomorrow for my next 20 minutes

love
Sarah

Is figure skating really a sport?

As we wait for the winter Olympics to open I wait with anticipation for the figure skating. There isn't a lot of sport that I like and mostly my partner and I go to the 'footie' which in Melbourne means Australian rules football. I love its fast pace, interactions and how all the action happens on the pitch and not the stands. The other sport that I love is the figure skating and really only get to enjoy it once every four years.

I can't ice-skate. This isn't me being modest. I really can't ice-skate. I have quite poor balance at the best of times and can trip over my own feet, a slight rise in the curb and many other things that others seem to manage effortlessly. As far as I know there is no particular problem except that somewhere along the line, I didn't learn how to balance very well. I did once try ice-skating and never managed to leave the side of the rink, where I held on as I edged round. Once round the rink was enough. But I love to watch it. This isn't a love of all things cold or the winter sports but a love of dance. I enjoy watching all sorts of dancing and gliding along on the ice adds another dimension and set of skills.

I love the interpretation of the music, the costumes and the amazing skills of the dancers. Whilst the singles is okay, it is the pairs dancing that I love the most. I am even willing to stay up later than 10pm to enjoy watching the pairs figure skating. The problem is this. I am the only one that enjoys it. There are members of my family, who will remain nameless but you know who you are, who say that it isn't a real sport. What is a real sport? Men pounding each other in a ring or seeing who can catch the biggest fish?

According to the dictionary it is 'an activity involving physical exertion and skill in which an individual or team competes against another or others for entertainment.' In my opinion figure skating fulfils all the requirements to be a real sport, not that I need an excuse to watch and enjoy figure skating this year or any other. I will enjoy being able to share the definition of sport though. 

For fellow figure skating lovers, enjoy the next few weeks

love
Sarah

How Karma kicked my butt

I am not a religious person but I do sometimes think about karma and if it exists and if so, how does it play out? Today I got of taste of what it might feel like if it exists and to be frank, I deserved it.

This morning I travelled first from Melbourne airport to Sydney and then from Sydney to middle NSW on a very little plane that was rather bumpy, which has nothing to do with the karma aspect, or does it?

While I was waiting at Melbourne a rather agitated ground crew member put out several calls for 3 passengers that were holding up a flight. I wondered how they could have possibly missed the messages and were they shopping, eating or busy chatting. I hoped they made their flight and wondered what could have delayed them.

You can probably guess what is coming next.

Yes, when I was at Sydney I miss judged the time and thought that the time on my boarding pass was the time that I was due at the gate, which is how it was done in Melbourne. Apparently this was not the case and I was just thinking that I should make my way to the gate when a rather agitated ground crew member called my mobile to find out where I was and if I was still planning on taking the flight because I was holding it up and everyone else was on the bus waiting to go to the plane and hadn't I heard the 3 calls that they put out for me? Ummm, no. I hadn't heard the calls, probably because of the din of the food hall and the fact that I was on my mobile answering missed calls that occurred during my flight from Melbourne.

I raced to the gate, down the stairs and got on the bus to some rather unpleasant stares. I wonder if they thought that I had been shopping, eating or busy chatting. They would have been correct about the eating and chatting. I said nothing. What was there to say?

Was it Karma? I have no idea but I do know that there is no reason to judge others because we never really know the full story of how or why someone did this or didn't do that. I am reminded of a true story that I was told about judging others.

A man is on a long train ride and in his carriage there are two children jumping up and down on seats, running up and down the isle and generally being noisy and disruptive. Their father is on the train with them and appears to do nothing to get them to be a little less boisterous. The man gets off at the station and so does the father with the two children. The father turns to the man and says "I'm really sorry for the disruption caused by my children but you see their mother died last week and they don't know how to cope".

When Karma kicks me next time I will know that I have been judgemental again and need another reminder.

love
Sarah

The latest in dental treatment

Isn't technology amazing. A couple of years ago we gave a lift to an older friend of ours. She was in her eighties and I will call her *Nancy for this blog because this is not her name. The journey was a couple of hours so we decided to play some music along the way. Nancy was finding it difficult to hear what we were saying and she seemed to be getting a bit fatigued so music seemed like a good option. Whilst I have nearly 1000 tunes on my ipod we didn't think that *Nancy would appreciate the wonders of Roy or Credence, never mind some early Stones or Super Tramp, so we settled on Frank. We figured that old blue eyes would be to *Nancy's taste and when we asked her she seemed very happy with the idea.

"Play Frank Sinatra" I said out loud so that the 'Sync' would know what to play and sure enough the mellow tones of Frank soon filled the car. *Nancy was amazed and we all had quite a long discussion on the wonders of technology. Even the early James Bond cars didn't have 'sync'.

You may be wondering what 'sync' has to to with the latest dental treatment. Everything and nothing. It has everything to do with it because technology continues to improve and offer all sorts of assistance and improvements to our daily lives, although not all technology is wonderful (in my opinion). Of course 'sync' has nothing specifically to do with dental treatment other than this: ten years ago we couldn't have imagined what is possible now.

My orthodontist told me yesterday that I need to consider a gum graft at some point in the future. I was astounded. They graft gums? Apparently they have been grafting gums for several years now but it is only in the last year or so that they have really improved it sufficiently to make it a viable option for people with receding gums. Currently the success rate is about 86% according to the orthodontic hygiene nurse, depending on several variable factors. Like anyone presented with such information I promptly went home and googled it. What did we do before google? Anyway, there are now even more ways to have your gums grafted and this technique continues to improve, grow and develop.

When I was little we didn't know that lots of lollies were bad for your teeth or that sugar caused dental caries. We didn't floss or have mouth wash and having dental treatment could be brutal. My childhood dentist didn't believe in local anaesthetic for fillings or orthodontic treatment although many dentists did. As a nurse I had older ladies who had had all their teeth removed before they got married as part of their dowry to their future husband. The thinking behind this was that you couldn't promise not to get sick and cost your husband money but if you had all your teeth out you could promise not to cost any money in dental care. They figured that dentures were much cheaper than dental care. Imagine walking down the isle with a full set of dentures.

Now local anaesthetics are more effective and the options for providing dental care continue to develop offering us the best preventative, curative and restorative dental care that we have ever had. I look forward to the day when it is available on Medicare (the national health service) and until then I am continually grateful that I have a lovely, gentle and excellent dentist. Despite our poor start, my generation may be the first to reach their older years with their own teeth.

Enjoy having health teeth and gums

love
Sarah

Why do I find it difficult to delegate?

I really struggle with delegation. This is my perception. Some of my children would probably tell you that I am very good at it whilst the older two despair at my delegation skills. Why is it that some of us find it so hard to delegate whilst other people are very good at it?

I have been thinking about this rather a lot of late, mainly because working for myself has increased my working hours in some ways although it never feels like it because I love what I do. I have also become much better at taking time out for me in addition to doing things like writing this blog every day. The flip side of this s is that I am finding less and less time for running the house on a day to day basis. I have 4 young adults living at home and could easily delegate more out to them and yet I don't - yet! WHY?????

For some reason I feel a bit guilty asking them to do additional domestic things. They each have weekly chores including a washing up roster and yet I often find myself running round trying to fit it all in whilst they are relaxing in front of the television or doing what ever it is they do when they aren't working or studying. They don't know that I am running round because I don't tell them and I find that when I do ask them they usually undertake the task with good humour. So why don't I ask more often?

I suspect that it goes way back to some limiting belief around the role of the mother in the home and/or wanting to be a good mother and homemaker and/or feeling bad about asking for additional help round the house. It could also have something to do with personality types. I am a 'S/I' type (DISC) which means that I am a bit of a home-maker and mother hen and also like to have fun. I am people focused rather than outcome focused. Because of this I am more likely to make sure that everyone else is okay even if this means that I run round whilst they relax. However if I was a high 'D' with some 'C' then I would be outcome focused and I would find delegating quite easy and a natural process. Whilst my personality type plays some part this is not an excuse or reason not to learn how to delegate effectively, which in my case means more often.

To be a really good parent I need to help prepare them for when they all leave home and live on their own. Whilst they can all cook a meal, shop, clean and do laundry they are yet to learn what it is to run the house on a day to day basis. I am pretty confident that they could, which means that they will be able to look after themselves when they leave the nest and yet...and yet here I am still running round trying to fit in writing for 20 minutes and prepare dinner.

So today I announce to the world that I am going to delegate more. To my children who are reading this, if you live at home with me then yes, this means you. Yes, even more help than you are already giving. I hope that the fact that I really appreciate the help makes it slightly easier to do more but if not, then you can enjoy telling me how hard done by you are.

If anyone reading this has some hints and tips on improving my delegating skills then I welcome all your advice in the comments section below and thank you in advance.

Women of the world - let's delegate more.

love
Sarah

Great Barrier Reef

In 1998 I was lucky enough to be treated to a visit to Cape Tribulation by my brother and his wife, which included spending a day on a boat to see the Great Barrier Reef. The day started with taking off our shoes and wading out to a little floatable boat to get to the big boat. When I asked why we had to go in single file I was informed that it was to prevent attracting box jelly fish. I was very vigilant on the way to that little boat.

Once on the big boat it was off to the reef and during the trip the crew gave us our safety talk about all the ways that we had to behave to keep ourselves and the reef safe. This included how to attract attention to the crew on the boat when we were in the water and the reassurance that they would be on the look out for Tiger sharks so not to worry. I had never seen or even heard of a Tiger shark and for some reason a shark the similar size and temperament of a grey nursing shark came into my head. Wearing a dark coloured t-shirt over my bathers and covered in sunblock I took my first plunge into the sea near the reef. The boat anchors a short distance from the reef to prevent any damage to it. This was also the first time that I had snorkeled so was getting used to a large mask, snorkel and flippers. The crew pointed out the direction of the beautiful coral and off we swan.

I had my head down searching for coral but all I could see was the sandy bottom of the sea bed. After several minutes I looked up to see a crew member pointing to where all the other swimmers had reached. I had managed to swim round the boat. The crew member assessed the situation and threw me a life ring in addition to re-orientating me and this time I paddled off, with the help of the life ring, looking up until I reached the rest of the swimmers.

I put my head down for my first glimpse of the Great Barrier Reef and was astounded. I don't think that anything could have prepared me for its sheer beauty. It is stunningly beautiful, with a wide variety of coral in a range of colours in various shapes and formations with their spouts pointing up towards the surface. Some are hard and still whilst others have fronds that wave with the motion of the sea currents. In and of itself it was more serene and breath-taking than I could ever imagined but there was more. An ever changing variety of fish swimming around the coral added to this scene. Fish of all different sizes, shapes, designs and colours swimming within the fronds and stems of the coral in an ever moving picture. All thoughts of sharks and sunburn vanished from my head. There was only enough room for the sight in front of me, all around me and as far as I could see along the reef. I may have stayed floating over it for ever if it weren't for several factors.

Having never snorkeled before I kept forgetting that I couldn't breath through my nose so would attempt to do so and then freak out and panic causing me to take in great mouthfuls of seawater. This meant coming up to spit out the seawater, take a few breaths and resume looking at the reef. The other reason that I stopped floating over it was because we all had to swim back to the boat for lunch.

We were treated to a second swim after lunch before heading back to near the shore for the wade back to the beach with shoes in hand. Slightly sun burnt where my t-shirt had lifted and there was a missing part of sunblock, slightly dehydrated from all that saltwater and not drinking enough regular water I returned to the hotel still spell-bound by what I had seen.

And now I read that the government plan to allow tons and tons of waste to be dumped on it. I am not usually passionate about political issues but this one has pressed some hot buttons. Maybe they haven't seen the reef because to me it is beyond comprehension that anyone who had visited the Great Barrier Reef would want to drop so much as a soggy biscuit on it.

As for the Tiger sharks when I got home I saw a documentary on them and it was only then that I realised what I could have met whilst paddling over the reef. So not the size and temperament of a nursing shark then. And would knowing their size and ferocity have stopped me seeing the reef? Absolutely not.

I would love to know that such treasures will be around for my grandchildren to visit and enjoy. Let's start protecting more rather than less.

love
Sarah